Big Cars with Two Doors

Riding-style boots. David Foster Wallace's Infinite Jest. Sake. The last four Radiohead albums. Coconuts.

These things are all pretty difficult to get in to, but yield some reward if you have patience and resolve. Particularly if you are stranded on a desert island with the latter as your only form of nourishment. *

Also difficult to get in to? The backseat of cars with two doors! The lever pulling! The seat yanking! The head hitting! All the frustration inevitably resulting in "you know what? Let's take my car instead."

I do not begrudge small cars of the two-door variety. If the VW bug had four doors, I doubt any of them could accommodate a full-sized human. However, there is a Ford F-ing Explorer model with two doors. I'm sorry, but expect that my doors/MPG ratio is better than 1/6.

Next up for Banishment: Automated Pay Parking Garages vs. Words with two correct spellings

*What would a shipwreck movie be without a montage of the protagonist dropping and rock-bashing coconuts until finally devising a reliable way to get to the edible part? It would be a disappointment, that's what.