Like Crocs or mullets, stupid baby names initially felt too much like low hanging fruit. Then came Bronx Mowgli Wentz. Poor, doomed, Bronx Mowgli.Firstly, please take a moment to say "Bronx Wentz" out loud five times in a row. As much as I would like to see poor little Bronx avoid the ranks of countless celebrity offspring relegated to "designing t-shirts" or "spinning records," the alternative is far scarier. If he manages to extricate himself and lands, say, in corporate America, some poor sap will have to answer the phone "Bronx Wentz's office" a hundred times a day. This will likely result first in lingual exhaustion, and then in murder-suicide.
And then there's the Mowgli. Mowgli. I hope this means that Pete and Ashlee have accepted that the best thing to do for their son would be to "lose" him in the Indian jungle so that he can be raised by a friendly bear. But I doubt it.
Also, just because his name ends in an "x" does not mean he gets to be automatic besties with Maddox, Pax, and Knox Jolie-Pitt. Maybe he'll have better luck with Sage Moonblood Stallone, Speck Wildhorse Mellencamp, or Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper and Trig Palin.
Next items up for Banishment: Big Cars with only 2 doors vs. The Cheesecake Factory
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4 comments:
I LOATHE Cheesecake Factory.
I resent its corporateness, I resent the overly-large portions, I resent that there are too many choices on the menu, catering to our every fatty whim, and most of all, I resent that I'm expected to wait 45 minutes for a table.
see ya, cheesecake factory!
I vote big cars with 2 doors.
I kind of have a soft spot for the Cheescake, as terrible as it is. You know one of those first love first date sort of things. I know, I'm a terrible person - but the avocado eggrolls are good!
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